3 Reasons I Hate Tweetups

Oh yes I AM blogging ’bout this.
After several Tweetups, I’ve noticed the same things happening over and over and I am no longer keeping my piehole shut. So to all who go to Tweetups, PLEASE FLIPPIN’  READ.

1. Organizers: please, I beg you, pick a place where the music is not super duper loud – especially during conferences.

Am I the only one who repeatedly have these conversations?
Person: “Hi I’m adlskjfd.”
Me: “What?”
Person: “I AM ALKSJLSDF”
Me: “WHAT??”
Person: “MY NAME IS A:LSKDJSAL, WHAT’S YOURS?”
Me: “I AM SORRY, CAN’T HEAR. TWEET ME!!!!”
<Person: “WHAT???”
Me: (gestures to phone and shows Tweetie, as if to Tweet me)
Person: “OK!”
Me: “SO SORRY. BYE!”
Not sure about you, but the reason I go to swanky bars and pay for overpriced drinks at conferences is to meet and connect with those I’ve been interacting with online in, you know, person. I am tired of losing my voice just to learn someone’s name. Especially after a conference where the yelling happens three or four days in a row.

2. People: please, please, please, step your agenda games up!

Look, you may or may not have an agenda and you may or may not show up to Tweetups with your agendas. Whatever, that’s fine. I respect your hustles. But please quit being so damn lame.

If you’re there to network, show up with a few more questions other than: “So what do you do? Who are you on Twitter? How many followers do you have?” OR “I am BLAH. I did BLAH. I am SO womp, womp, womp. I know ‘name drop’ and ‘another name drop’ and ‘yet another name drop’. Do YOU know these people? Aren’t I so great?”
…do you realize how STUPID you sound?
Try to be more interesting, ask a few questions that shows you are interested in the person you are talking to, and learn who or what they are about. Small talk 101.
I swear, the next person who gets all PR on me, I’ll punch in the throat. Ok, fine. That’s a lie. Since I’m not violent, I’ll just respond in Japanese.

3. Last but not least: EVERYONE. Get separate tabs or PAY YOUR PORTION OF THE MOTHER EFin BILL.

The math isn’t tough, folks. You drink, you pay. You order, you pay. You eat off someone’s plate – at LEAST offer to chip in some tip – it’s common. flippin’. sense.

If you can’t or don’t want to pay, don’t order! Or better yet, STAY HOME.
I cannot believe how many people skip out on the bill. I don’t get it, I really don’t. Where are your manners and common courtesy? Seriously.
I am truly embarrassed for us (the Twitterverse / Internet) that I have to blog about this -especially the third point.
Are we really this socially inept?

33 thoughts on “3 Reasons I Hate Tweetups

  1. Apparently, yes many attendees to Tweetups ARE that socially inept. Once the 140 character restriction goes away, and they can no longer ponder on the perfect comeback, they are at a loss.
    But the good news is they will read your tutorial.

    1. My biggest issue is with number three, since I’ve been to ONE too many (non sponsored) Tweetups where people just show up, order a crap load, and leave. SO RUDE! Thanks for your comment :)

  2. hmmm, where are you going to tweetups? In San Diego we have nametags (dorky but necessary) — and not too many are THAT pretencious. You might get pitched but no one has ever mentioned how many followers they have — unless in context, i.e. “I’m pretty new, I only have 10 followers”

    I would hate tweetups too if that’s what they were like

    1. There are organized, sponsored Tweetups where we have nametags and drink tickets, but unsponsored large group Tweetups (especially at conferences), the above has happened more often times than not. So embarrassing. But it sounds like I need to go to San Diego, where a few people aren’t stuck at the end of the night with the awkward feeling of ummmm so who’s going to cover the rest of the bill type deal. :)

      Thanks for your comment :)

  3. I would also like to request that the women at these things stop throwing themselves at me. Or at least have the decency to wait and send me a slutty DM afterward.

  4. WOW, we had to be in the same Room together at a few of these Tweetups around the country. I have been to those type of functions only to find they were organized by someone who never gets to listen to loud thumping music and the opportunity was the only way his company would allow him to write his drunk off on his expense account.
    I hate to say..I do feel pretty stupid that I even fell for going to the several I went to.

    However, I have gone to a couple here in Dallas that were EXCELLENT small affairs (less than a 100) quiet and got a lot of connections made. Whether the host sponsor got anything out of it is another story.

    1. LOL. Well the Internet (blogosphere, Twitterverse) seems to be one huge frat party – and that is fine, but save that noise for the afterparty!

      But on a serious note, I sound like a total hater and this doesn’t apply to every single Tweetup but like I keep saying, these types of situations have happened more often times than not. And I too have been to several great ones as well (in Seattle, SF, Vegas, LA, etc.)

      This was just a rant. Don’t mind me. ;) Thanks for your input.

    1. It’s SO RUDE!! And you know more than anyone how many times this has happened to us. Seriously. If you can’t pay: STAY HOME or DON’T ORDER!!

      Thanks for the comment, Karianne!

  5. I think People Scavenger Hunts are very good for “tweetups”. They can be lots of fun and interactive. Let me plan a tweetup. It will be off the hook.

  6. Agreed, agreed and agreed.

    And one more thing, all the tweetups I’ve ever been to involve people standing around staring, scrolling or pecking at their phones. Need proof? Look up pictures for any tweetup in LA on Facebook.

    GET OFF YOUR PHONES!

  7. the last big tweetup I went to we got a bar to give us a private balcony on one of the nicest days in the city (Nashville mind you). The organizers also put together a $300 pre-paid tab thanks to sponsors. So for the 1st hour and a half everyone got to drink for free.

    Come to realize 45 minutes into it – no one had tipped.

    Tweetups can be fun, informative, and great ways to make friends and influence people – but they are more often then not a good way to weed out who’s a keeper & who just showed up to get fed/drunk/laid.

  8. I seriously hope the people with the “agendas” aren’t the ones skipping out on the bill. Maybe these poor souls really are socially inept and should put down the Twitter and spend more time in the company of real people rather than avatars.

    So sad, too bad, buh bye.

    Martha (who ALWAYS pays her share and sometimes even picks up the bill)

    1. I need to register my own domain already…seriously. FAIL.

      But I *do* have a post I’ve been sitting on for a while, maybe I’ll ask you to publish it since, you know, it’s all on that soc med crap…err I mean very important official stuff ;)

  9. TOo True! Of course the irony in your last statement is that so many in the world believe that twitterers are socially backwards. Even funnier is that I’ve meet people at a tweet up that I tweet with and then not connected the dots that Joe Blow is @joemamma. Perhaps the music really was too load to really converse.

    But I must confess that I almost always use the “so what do you do?” line. Funny enough I had a girl say to me. “why do you always ask that question? We all do the same thing here!”

    LOL… But I will have to blog this myself.

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